FREQUENTLY ASKED QUESTIONS
Did you post this absurd garbage on your company website as a thinly veiled attempt to boost your pathetically weak self-esteem?
Yes. Yes I did. But only because it’s also a perfect opportunity to thank you for all of your support of my madness over the years. I made up this stupid show 5 years ago to make people happy and contribute something to society because, selfishly, that would make me happy. Now we’ve raised over a million dollars for various causes with a silly comedy show and that never would have happened if it wasn’t for YOU making contributions to our campaigns (with the exception of Dustin and Steve…) and, frankly, for YOU believing in me (Fuck you, Mike).
A most special and important THANK YOU to the truly artisanal, Mr. Jonathan Shiffman, who rallied a crew of amazing musicians to be the backing band for so many of these crazy shows over the years. Jon dedicated so much time, energy, and love to helping me run with a weird concept. Love you, Jonny Boy. And again… fuck you, Mike.
Did you just casually slip in the fact you raised a million dollars in that last answer — to a question you posed to yourself, no less — as if we didn’t see the obnoxious banner at the top of the page declaring the same thing?
Yes. I am shameless.
Seek help?
Fuck you, Mike.